After a bit, things got really quiet in Frank and Louise's family room. They lay together like a lump of human flesh, crammed into a leather recliner. A happy lump of flesh if the expression on Louise's face was any indication. And no wonder. What kind of bozo went without sex for six weeks if they had a willing partner? Celibacy sucked. Felicity didn't practice it and didn't prescribe it. In fact, they ought to pass a law against it. They really ought to.
When Louise finally climbed off her husband, he tucked his joy stick back into his pants and zipped up his fly. At least, he had the decency to look ashamed of himself. Whether for denying his wife all that time or for giving them some information on Sylvester wasn‘t clear. She'd have to discover that before she could fix things. At least, the shtupping had removed the empty stare from his face. Maybe now she could get through to him.
She pulled up the hassock again and sat down. “I understand about Sylvester, Frank. I had my own time with him back in the day. He's a persuasive guy, but he does not have your best interests at heart.”
“He said you'd say that, too,” Frank said.
They'd gotten past complete denial. Good sign. “What does he do for you?”
“Self love,” Frank answered. “He's taught me how to become my own best friend.”
“Nothing wrong with that, but you're not supposed to be your own wife, too.”
“Yeah, Frank,” Louise tossed in.
“Yeah, Frank,” Jason added.
Felicity glanced over her shoulder at her partner.
He shrugged. “I spent too much time making love to my hand. That's no way to live.”
“You did?” That came from Louise and Frank in unison.
“I wasn’t always Wonderslut’s partner. It took me a long time to get her to take me seriously.”
“You're not doing anything good for the franchise, kid,” Felicity said. She'd have to have a conversation about revealing personal information. Frank and Louise didn’t have to know about the time when Jason had been Jay, the computer geek, and not the Piston. To do their best work, they needed to remain mysterious and super-hero-y. Fucking the customers was one thing, making confessions to them was another.
“I wanted to let Frank know I understand where he's coming from,” Jason said.
“You do?” Frank and Louise again.
“Maybe you think you can do this better than I can,” Felicity said.
“Maybe I can,” Jason said.
Oh great, the Piston was going to Take a Stand on something, and there was no point trying to talk him out of it. Perhaps the time had come to let him sink or swim.
She rose from her seat. “All right. Give it your best shot.”
Jason took her place. “We're guys, Frank. We both know that a woman doesn't always know what makes us feel good.”
Felicity and Louise exchanged glances. Were the guys going to “bond“ now? Go out into the woods and bang on drums. Some kind of ritual fighting, maybe. Paint themselves blue and pound on their chests, maybe.
“Sometimes only another man understands,” Jason said.
“That's pretty much what Sylvester teaches us,” Frank said.
Jason slanted a glance toward Felicity. An “I-told-you-so” expression. They could discuss that later, too. Then he turned back to Frank.
“Is it all guys at the meetings?” Jason asked Frank.
Frank stared at Louise for a moment and then turned his glare on Felicity. “I'm not going to talk in front of women.”
Felicity's vision turned red with rage around the edges. That kind of attitude would not stand. The whole picture fit together, now that she thought of it. Self-gratification rather than sharing, denying Louise her wifely due, anti-woman views. A steaming pile. He'd take it back or feel her riding crop in a decidedly non-sexual way.
“You're going to talk in front of your wife and me, Frank,” she said. “Believe me, you’ve only had a sample of what I can do to you.”
Frank just sneered at her. Bozo that he was.
“Listen, sucker, I can fix it so you never have another boner again, no matter what you do for yourself,” she said. “I was Sylvester's best student, and I've advanced my studies since then. You do not want to cross me.”
“She's right,” Jason said.
She glanced at Louise. “Was he like this when you married him?”
“He was a real pussy cat,” Louise answered.
“Pussy whipped,” Frank corrected.
Okay, this was becoming perfectly clear. Sly had been running some kind of oppression-of-males pity-party. The sort of thing that real men wouldn't be caught dead at. Sly probably was running the same sort of meetings for the women who were walking around with the blank stares. Of course, that would sound more like a he-doesn't-realize-what-a-princess-you-are script. Neither sex had an monopoly on self-centeredness, and a clever guy like Sly would know how to monopolize on it. You could power all the turbines in the world with the selfish energy of people who thought the world didn't appreciate their wonderfulness. Add a sexual charge to that, and you had a weapon that could bring society to its knees.
“So, Sylvester is teaching you how to give yourself what you need,” Jason said.
Frank crossed his arms over his chest. “That's pretty much it.”
Felicity balled her hand into a fist. “I'll give you what--”
Jason rose and grabbed her hand. He was right, of course. First, Frank had been brainwashed. He might have welcomed Sly's message, but Sly was clearly manipulating his mind. Second, they didn't take out their own emotions on the clients. In her work, she'd seen some pretty insensitive clods, of both sexes. Avenging the non-orgasmic usually meant teaching a lesson to selfish lovers. Lecturing and shouting didn't work. Demonstrating how they could make their own lives better by satisfying their partners did. That's what she had to do here. But the anti-woman crap galled.
“Okay, this is what we're going to do, Frank,” she said. “You're going to make love to Louise again, and this time, you're going to mean it.”
Frank stared at his wife. Not as blankly as he had before. Or should she have said not as “Blanche-ly“? Clearly, he was not convinced, though. He would be by the time Felicity was done with him.
“You'd better do it, Frank,” Louise said. “I'm not going to wait for you forever.”
Which brought up something Felicity hadn't actually considered. Relationships all over the country would start breaking up in a matter of weeks if she didn't find Sly and put his evil plans to an end. Millions of divorces. Millions more live-in love relationships screeching to a halt. Millions of horny people stalking the streets. Utter chaos. She and Jason could wind up saving the nation, much more than a frustrated libido here and there. What a burden to have to shoulder, but they had no choice. If they didn't restore sexual sanity, who would?
She took a deep breath. Time to roll up her sleeves and get to work. Of course, the sleeves of her Wonderslut outfit didn't roll up, but that was the best cliche she could come up with at the moment, and why was she wasting valuable time thinking up cliches, anyway? She had a whole world to save.
She jerked herself back to the present to find three sets of eyes fixed on her. She cleared her throat. “What are you all waiting for?”
Jason shrugged. “Instructions?”
“Right. Louise, you're already undressed,” she said. “Good move.”
“Where do you want me?” Louise asked.
“There on the carpet is fine,” she said. “Take off your clothes, Frank.”
When he didn't immediately follow instructions, Felicity fixed her glare on him. “Do we have to go through the lie detector thing again? You know I can make you obey orders. Just do it.”
Grumbling, Frank removed his shoes and socks and then rose to shuck out of the rest of his clothing. He wasn't wearing a whole lot, just slacks and a polo shirt for the outer layer. Underneath, he wore boxers, and the distinct outline of another erection showed through the cotton. For a guy who insisted that he only wanted to sit in a room pulling on his cock with a bunch of other men doing the same thing, he could sure get hard on command.
“Now then, you're going to get on the floor with your wife, and every time you do something that makes her feel good, you're going to get a little shock of the jollies for yourself,” she said.
He stretched out next to Louise and put his hand between her legs. No prelude, no subtlety. Clearly, he thought he could get through this exercise quickly with no emotional involvement on his part. He had a surprise coming. As he stroked his wife's pussy, her eyes closed in pleasure and she let out a little groan. Though Frank tried to hide his response, his anatomy gave away his response. His fleshy truth-teller got a bit harder. While his cock swelled, he remained on his side, but now he looked down into Louise's face. Something in his expression registered, as though he was remembering something after waking up from a long nap.
His hand had stilled, and Louise's eyes opened. She reached up and stroked his cheek. “Remember, Frank? Our honeymoon on Maui. We'd stopped making love a few weeks before so we'd both want each other like mad.”
“Our way of saving ourselves for the big night.” A silly grin spread over Frank's face. Not a blank stare, but the way husbands got when their wives modeled a new negligee for them.
“It could be like that for us again,” Louise whispered. “Come back to me.”
“Snookums.” Frank bent and gave her a brief kiss.
Louise giggled. “My caveman.”
“Babyface,” he answered.
“Superstud,” she said.
Felicity rolled her eyes. “Brother.”
“It's kind of cute,” Jason said.
“You would think so,” she said. “Look, you two, we have some unfinished business here. Can we get on with it?”
Of course, “we” didn't include her, which was sort of a shame, actually. By the time she finished here, she would have dealt with genital stimulation and orgasms for hours -- none of them hers. She'd probably have to work out a few kinks with Jason, but she'd never get to that if Frank and Louise spent a bunch of time on baby talk.
Finally, Frank got into the swing of things, kissing his wife for real while his hand roamed all over her body. Though he didn't seem to need help any longer to get excited with Louise, Felicity let her charm stand. With each touch to the sensitive parts of Louise's body, he became more and more aroused. His member grew to very nice dimensions and turned a livid color. He kept working Louise's hot spots, sucking a nipple into his mouth while he tugged at the other one with his fingers. Soon, the two of them were lost to the real world, having crossed the border into the wonder world of spiraling lust.
It was almost too personal to watch, but then, Felicity had done this work for some time and not much embarrassed her anymore. She'd forgotten Jason's relative inexperience, though, so she shouldn't have been surprised when he moved behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.
“I wish I was doing all that to you,” he murmured into her ear.
“It's not about us, sweetpea. It's about the job.”
“Are you sure?” He bent and nibbled at her neck. Just the way she liked it. He'd learned entirely too much about what could melt her into a puddle.
“We could sneak away,” he murmured against her skin. “They'd never miss us.”
“I have to stay. The mission. It's more important than our gratification.”
“Nothing's more important than our gratification.”
There was a...um...mission. A big one. A really big one. She...oh...just had to remember what it was. Oh, yeah, just like that. There.
Will Wonderslut regain enough control to see her mission through to its conclusion? Or will Jason’s lovemaking drive the threat to the nation completely out of her mind? Will they slip away to Take Care of Business, or will Louise and Frank get a show like one they’ve never seen before?
Alice's website
authoralicegaines@yahoo.com
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